Most of us have heard the saying, “You can’t change others. You can only change your response.” I’d like to apply that concept to time management.
All of us have the same amount of time, so the only thing we can really “manage” is our response to the challenges and opportunities presented to us.
How has your response been working for you? Are you ready to try a different approach?
I am convinced the most effective approaches to time management have nothing to do with using the right calendar, planner or To Do app. All of those things can be useful, but they are just tools. What matters most is how we manage our own response to our circumstances.
I’ll be writing more about this in the coming months. Today, I want to start with nurturing your best possible self. This is the self who has an easier time making good choices. The self who doesn’t get overwhelmed quite so easily. The self who is more compassionate. The self who can stay focused a little longer, and think a little more clearly.
Your best possible self is the self you want managing your response, when times get tough. This is the self you want planning ahead, when times are good. The more your best possible self is showing up for you, the better off you will be, regardless of your circumstances.
So here’s an experiment to try. Give yourself a break from all those tips, tricks and strategies you’ve been feeling guilty about not using. Instead, turn your attention to nurturing your best possible self.
Your best possible self understands that life is hard, and you can’t be perfect. That’s why it’s your best possible self. Some days, more is possible than others.
Your best possible self appreciates any small token. It doesn’t expect you to suddenly (or ever) become a Yoga master who only eats organic food and meditates an hour a day. Your best possible self will be delighted that you took a 5-miute walk. It will be thrilled that you said no to a second serving of spaghetti. Extremely pleased that you flossed your teeth before bed. It doesn’t take much to impress your best possible self.
What could you do now, in the next five minutes, that could help you be your best possible self for the next hour?
Have you eaten today? Have you gone outside? Had a chance to stretch your muscles and get your blood flowing? Have you laughed today? Have you allowed yourself just a few minutes to focus on nothing else except breathing, (or music, or a pleasant thought, or whatever your best self likes)?
What could you do tonight, that would help you be your best possible self, tomorrow?
How can you set the stage for a smooth departure in the morning? How can you prepare your house, dim the lights, turn down the temperature, so that you can get to bed a bit earlier? Tonight, when you’re zoned out on the couch in front of the TV, because it’s the only time you have to decompress after another stressful day, what other activity could be just as soothing, just as relaxing? A book? Music? A bath?
Remember, your best possible self doesn’t look for miracles. It rejoices in any small attempt to nurture it along. And the more you nurture it, the more it can help you to keep it up. It’s kind of cool how it works that way!
We can’t change the time we have, but we can nurture ourselves so that we are responding with our best possible selves to the challenges and opportunities we face.