Does this happen to you? You start one project, like reclaiming your kitchen countertop, and suddenly you’re working on three projects:
- Updating your filing system so you can file the tax documents that came in the mail
- Researching recycling bins so you can find something large enough to hold all the empty bottles littering your counter
- Reorganizing your pantry so you can put away the groceries that never make it off the counter
At work, you may start the project of scheduling an inservice for the new documentation system. Suddenly, you’re working on:
- Trying to figure out the new documentation system
- Scheduling times for one-on-one meetings with your direct reports
- Catching up on your own documentation
No wonder it all feels so overwhelming! So how to manage it all?
Getting clear
First, get clear on your end goal for the current work session. A clear counter top. An inservice scheduled with invitations sent. Know what your destination for this work session looks like. An important part of project work is identifying clear mini-completions for your work sessions. This will help you stay focused and feel in control.
Next, be prepared that working on your current project will make you aware (or remind you) of several other projects.
- If you’re working on a physical project, like de-cluttering or organizing, designate a place to set aside any items that will become a project of their own. This could be photos to organize, papers to file, clothes to be dry-cleaned, etc.
- For thinking or writing projects, create a capture list to write down any new projects that come to light.
As you work on your current project, be especially alert for any spin-off projects that may distract you. Be prepared with a mantra or reminder to stay on task with your current project. Your current project is NOW. Everything else is NOT NOW.
More complicated with ADHD
For those with ADHD, all of this can be especially tricky and paralyzing overwhelm can set in quickly. Why?
- An ADHD brain sees the big picture and understands how everything is related. It has a very difficult time differentiating and compartmentalizing the separate pieces.
- An ADHD brain may view all those separate pieces as equally important and equally urgent, which is not true.
- An ADHD brain has more difficulty sequencing, which is figuring out where to start and which steps come in which order. (A lot of times, this works itself out if you just start anywhere.)
- An ADHD brain has a hard time filtering out non-relevant stimuli.
And here’s the biggest bugaboo: People with ADHD are more likely to feel embarrassed or stressed about the spin-off projects. Negative self-talk creeps in saying things like,
“If I were more on top of things, I wouldn’t have all this extra work.”
“I just can’t do this.”
“I’m a loser who can’t do anything.”
None of this is true, but the resulting shame and embarrassment shuts down the brain making it really hard for the more logical brain to disrupt the negative, inaccurate thinking and find the way forward.
So for those with ADHD, it’s especially important to be prepared for project spin-off. It’s normal. It happens to everyone. It’s not all equally urgent. It’s okay to stick with your main goal. You’ll get it done and you’ll feel glad you did!
Resistance points
- But I’ll never get to those other projects. Is that really true? Probably not, but even if it is, at least your main project will be done, vs. walking away overwhelmed and not doing anything. If you’re very concerned, set a reminder for yourself.
- I need to do it now while I have the information fresh in mind. Leave a note with the project materials to remind yourself of what you intended to do.
- I’ll be distracted by those other projects if I don’t tackle them right away. Again, I wonder if that’s really true. Have you tried? Can you store them around the corner, out of sight? Maybe throw a sheet over them? What have you got to lose by trying? If you truly are too distracted by them, maybe you need to wrap up the first project and let it rest while you move onto one of the spin-offs. That’s okay, as long as you don’t beat yourself up for it.
- But what if it really is urgent? Okay, I give on that one. Sometime it’s so critical that you really do need to take care of it right away. Know that you will allow yourself to do that. You may need to put an important paper in a very secure location, or you may need to make a phone call before a hard deadline. Those are the inevitable exceptions. Set some boundaries for yourself about what makes something urgent, and then let those boundaries help you feel safe.
Cycling between spin-offs
Another exception. Sometimes, those spin-offs can actually help you stay focused, longer. You may avoid getting bored if you cycle between your main project and one or two spin-offs. Just be careful to keep it manageable.
Acceptance
In the end, a shift in perspective is the most helpful thing we can do. There will always be some unfinished projects. This is a reality to be accepted. The issue is not one of how to get it all done, but instead, how to stay focused only on the things that are truly relevant at this time in our lives. We need a safe place to store the projects and ideas that we can’t complete right now, but beyond that, there is no need to burden ourselves with the knowledge of their existence. They only become a problem if they encroach on our ability to make the most of our current life situation.
Comments are closed, but you can email me with your questions and rebuttals and I’ll answer personally and/or address them in a future post.